3 Wrong Ways to Love Yourself.

Why our attempts to be happy never feel like enough.

There is always something nagging at us in the background.

For example:
You’re in a committed relationship, but you wish your partner would show their love more. You wish he would open up about his feelings or be more romantic and loving. You decide to inspire him by cooking his favourite meal and inviting him for a shoulder massage.

You had a fun first date, but you’re not too excited about this new prospect. When your date calls to ask you out again, you say yes because she or he seemed like a nice person and you want to give this prospect a chance. Soon you’re worried sick that you’ll have to break up with someone you weren’t particularly interested in anyway.

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Are you ready to meet (and keep) the love of your life?

*Dress the love of your life.
Why is it that we often don’t feel happy, even when on the surface it seems like we have everything we need to feel happy?

You go shopping on a whim, spend hundreds of dollars on new clothes that days or weeks later still end up in the shopping bag in the back of your closet.

You just got a new job and spent a big chunk of your savings to move to a new city. But already you’re worried that it’s not what you want to do or where you want to live long term.

Why can’t you be happy?

You are searching for an inner emptiness and think that the answer to your ultimate happiness lies in changing your external circumstances – the partner, the job, the house, even your body.

I’m here to tell you that to fill that void, you must first learn to do the very thing that will change the way you feel about everything.

You must learn to love yourself.

When you love yourself you will be able to celebrate the inner peace and happiness you feel WITH the outside world, not BY it.

When you love yourself you will be able to enjoy the love you receive from others and not have to worry about them losing interest or leaving you.

When you love yourself you are unapologetic about living a life that speaks to you and who you really are. You don’t have to prove anything to anyone.

Learning to love yourself is powerful, but easier than you might think.

Learn to love yourself
What stops most people from doing the very thing that can make their lives better
When most people hear the advice: “You need to love yourself”, they either switch off or reject it outright. They think it’s too “off the wall” or they don’t understand what it really means.

This dilemma is unfortunate because loving yourself is the very thing that can make your life better in every way.

In my experience, there are 3 misguided approaches that people take to feel better about themselves and their lives. These approaches don’t work because they are a way of looking for love and approval elsewhere, rather than from within where it really counts.

*Have you ever done any of these things?

You spend money on yourself because you “deserve” it.
Loving yourself doesn’t mean buying nice things or pampering yourself with massages, holidays, a nice car or an expensive restaurant meal.

In fact, I see people who are constantly looking for the next big “fix” that will allow them to feel better about their life or relationship for a short time. The fixes will never work because underneath all the treats and expenses, you still don’t love yourself and who you really are at your core.

*You do things for others so they don’t think you’re a bad person.
This is a classic behaviour to please people. You say “yes” to things you want to do for others, even though you don’t actually have the time or desire to do them, because you don’t want to disappoint them.

*You don’t dare disagree with a friend because you are afraid they will be angry with you. You often wonder how you got caught up in commitments that turn out to be huge headaches.

If you seek approval from others to make yourself feel like a good, hard-working, loving person, you will forever be kicking yourself to the curb. Because no matter what compliments others give you, you’ll never feel like enough.

You keep searching for the perfect relationship.
You think that one day life will be so much better when you find the right partner and fall in love. You will finally feel like you belong, that you are understood and appreciated for who you are.

Looking for another person to make you feel whole is a losing strategy. This is because.

No one can make you feel like you deserve love no matter how much they say, “I love you”.
If you don’t love yourself, you won’t be able to feel loved by anyone else.

You will criticise, blame and lash out because deep down you can’t accept anyone for who they are because you can’t accept who YOU are.

The good news is that loving yourself doesn’t require nearly as much effort as trying to get someone else to love you. And it certainly doesn’t require you to max out your credit card to buy the things you think will make you happy.

Loving yourself is a much easier process than you think, and it’s MUCH more powerful than praise from a loved one or the momentary thrill of spending money on an experience or object.

The painless way to love yourself
It can change everything for you, because loving yourself is at the core of a happy life and of close and loving relationships that thrive.

*When you learn to love yourself, everything will change.

Your relationships will improve because you will no longer have to hide the real you from others. You will face challenges with honesty and integrity, which will allow you to feel safe and calm around friends and loved ones.

Your career and life purpose will change as you become clear about what you love to do and how you want to contribute to the world – without prejudice.

Your health and wellbeing will blossom as you become aware of what you need to be healthy and perform better every day, and you will have the self-respect to actually do it.

What you learn with me has the power to transform your life in three key areas: your emotions, your body and your relationships.

These three areas tend to bring out the biggest challenges in self-love and cause our problems to repeat themselves. In coaching and through physioenergetic treatments, I will guide you through specific experiential processes that will bring about a change in you that will then affect your whole life.

You will be able to let go of the negative thoughts and feelings that rob you of joy. You will learn to find peace within yourself, regardless of what is happening on the outside. You will find that you become more confident and self-assured, rather than nervous and needy – and that makes you so much more attractive. And you will feel free to be who you are, not who others expect you to be.

Experience a transformation in the first hour
Loving yourself can be one of the most transformative things you do that will improve all aspects of your life.

But it is a process that must begin within yourself, not outside of you.

As long as you look to other people or things to make you feel accepted and happy, everything you do will never feel like enough.

Only loving yourself can bring you the feeling of inner peace and contentment you have been longing for all along.

With love,

Healing Hands Luxembourg
Relationship Coaching
Support and Exchange Group

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